ENTER HERE: Win a C Band Dish & LNB from SatelliteAV!(Contest Over)

[sikma]

Well honey, as you know I currently have one 5' mesh on a pole with the 'arm' on it. You have also noticed (and commented on numerous times) about the other 4 Primestar stationary dishes (she actually called them big gray eggs). You've said you're tired of seeing them on the south side of the house all lined up like bowling pins.

Well, I have a solution to all your problems. It's called a 2.4M solid dish (I dont' dare tell her it's 8'......I'll cross that bridge when I come to it). Then she'll say...."what's the difference....if I know you, you'll just squeeze it inbetween the other 5." You don't understand dear, if I get the 2.4M then I can sell all of the other dishes. Her response, "who else besides you would be weird enough to buy old used satellite dishes?" (At this point I would ignore that last comment, as to not get involved in a p*****g contest)

I would then play my 'ace in the hole card'

Well, honey I'll make you a deal.....you know how you've been after me to landscape the south side of the house. If I get the 2.4M dish, I will install it in such a way along with an elaborate landscaping plan that will virtually 'hide' the dish. I may even hire a professional painter to turn the dish into a work of art. (I will also agree to take her to Germany to see her aunts and uncles)

I'm sure this scenerio will work...............if not, I'll just get the 2.4M an apartment and visit it on the side

 

[tmnden]

I wish I wish I had a bud

c-band ku-band i could do some heavy channel surfing with a bud and what i have now might have to lay outa work to get it done but with the wife off to work might be fun laying on the couch and playing sick because i,m just a d--- well you know

 

[Al K]

Me: "I've got a chance to win a satellite dish!"

Wife: "We need another dish like we need a 'bleep, bleep, bleep'."

 

[Othea]

What's this?

From what I can gather, honeybunchkins, someone must have submitted my name for a free dish without my knowledge. I can't imagine who might have done that! Are you sure it wasn't you? You're always coming up with such thoughtful surprises. No, really? Well, if you don't want it here, I guess we can just give it to my mom. But you know how she is -- she'll probably come over every time it needs to be adjusted, you know, like once or twice a week! Hmm, I'm just wondering though... do you think it would look strange with one of your clematis vines growing up the pole? Those plants have such lovely flowers and, from what I hear, butterflies just adore them! Or better yet, wouldn't if be nice if we could find something that would also attract hummingbirds? What's the name of that plant you like so much...? I keep forgetting...

 

[vfrjim]

Ummm, I know that we have 5 dishes already, but ummmm, I have a chance of getting another one, but it is FREE, yes FREE! I promise to camoflage it like a big flower if you let me have another dish and anything else you want.... P-L-E-A-S-E

She says: OK?

cool

 

[joel2665]

Sugar Pumpkin, I know how much you loved your outdoor dining set with the big 8 foot umbrella. It's just a shame about the storm ripping it to shreds. I'll tell you what; I'd like to replace that for you. Now wouldn't you like that?

 

[daydreamer]

Hey guess what I have a chance to win an 8ft satellte dish. It's free it won't cost us anything. Why do I need it you say? I could get more channels than I could get with my little Primestar dish. You say I can have it if I do a few things around the house? New roof on the house, Remodel kitchen and bathroom, Put up the garage door opener, Do laundry and dishes for 1 year? No problem!

 

[DirtyTurbin]

Hunny remember last time it stormed and you were watching your soap and the picture went crazy ,well this is the only way to fix it a 8ft dish. I knew you would understand.

 

[Pittsville]

Honey If you let me install this 8 foot dish I promise to turn it into that goldfish pond you've always wanted when I upgrade to a 10 foot dish.

I still need more information on building the goldfish pond and everybody knows that having a C band dish is the only way to learn about stuff like that.

 

[namvet]

Look honey! I just got this free West Virginia State Flower to commemorate your Mom's home state!

 

[jayelem]

Newlywed Wife: "What are you doing "
Me: "Checking my line of sight"
Wife: "What"
Me: "Don't worry, you'll like it"
Wife: " Oh common tell me "
Me: " You know how you don't like cold weather"
Wife: " Yeah "
Me: " Well I entered a contest for a Satellite dish "
Wife " and "
Me: " If we win we'll have ALOT of Channels to watch"
" and when it's 20 below and you refuse to leave the house"
" this will be the icing on the cake"
Wife: " I thought I was the icing on your cake"
Me: " You are, I'm doing this for us"
Wife: " so I don't see why this line of view thing, I mean you're making a
big deal about a dish"
" My parents have a dish, they didn't do no line of view"
Me: "line of sight , you see the neighbors tree"
Wife: "Yeah"
Me: " It might be in the way"
Wife: " wait, look at the neighbors dish, it doesn't point that way"
" Look at all the dishes around here, none of them point that way"
Me: " Well this dish will with a motor"
Wife: " HA, you've lost your mind, just call Dish Network"
Me: " It's a bigger dish, we wont have to pay for a subscription"
" and when your parents come they can watch TV from Mexico"
Wife " They already watch that stuff"
Me: " Nooo, not these channels , these are special"
Wife: " So why don't I see motors on the neighbors dishes if you can get
all these special channels"
Me: " Most people don't know about it, plus they have to have room for it"
Wife: " How big is it ?"
Me: " 8 ft round"
Wife: (Blank stare)
Wife: ""
Me: (Kisses her) " We'll be the envy of our friends"
Me: (kisses her again) " It's really cool , better than Dish"
Wife: " we'll I be able to use it or is it going to be like the car "
Me : " If we win you can drive the car all you want"
Wife: " How many times can you enter"
Me: "once"
Wife: " Can I enter ?"
Me: " I don't see why not"
Wife: " I hope we win, I mean were gonna have channels no one else
has"
Me: " Exactly , ( Hugs her )"

Thanks Satellite AV , I had fun with the essay, good luck everyone.

 

[BKP]

I"m Gittin" A Satellite Dish...

 

[banoonish]

I want one. Please pick me.

 

[rangersjay99]

(wife) You won a what?

(me) Honest honey, you will never see it, I'll mount it where it is hidden.

(wife) Will we be able to get rid of the 2 dishes on the roof now?

(me) Well, no, but.......

(wife) You have to be kidding me!!!!

 

[JohnH]

That 7.5' dish has Hail dents and don't work too swoof. I am going to enter to win a replacement which will look somewhat the same and get your shows better.

 

[photoman76]

You know bigger is better. . .

 

[Bass Cadet]

[Wife was in kitchen busy making dinner.]

"Hey, Chief, I found a great way to block the sun into the kitchen."

"How"

"We can put an 8' dish in the back. And it's free if we win the contest!"

"Really?"

Then she got distracted. I take that as an approval.

 

[Lurker]

You want what??!!

OVER MY DEAD BODY!

 

[Bass Cadet]

You want what??!!

OVER MY DEAD BODY!

Honey, I received your 8' circular gravestone today...

 

[FOMM]

im putting just one more dish in the yard, this is the last dish really i promise