Heh, you can't reason with them about Goodell, I've tried. He was recently asked about Irsay and said he was letting it play out further before taking action, and in the other cases I am pretty sure the league office (Goodell doesn't do all of the fining, shocker, I know) waits until the legal system has run it's course before imposing penalties on top of that. Bowe has yet to go to court and his dates have repeatedly slipped/been pushed back. Aldon Smith was in court this week, and Ray Rice and his wife have a press conference scheduled today and will probably not face criminal charges (will be surprised if he doesn't sit a game though). Each of these players are represented by a union that will appeal automatically no matter how light/hard the league is on them so everything that is done has to be careful and deliberate based on the fine schedules and precedents set forth by the PED and personal conduct policies.
Irsay is an owner, the possible punishment against him is not collectively bargained, it does not typically have precedent and it has not been rendered yet. He just got out of 2 months of rehab this week and was at the owner's meetings, but the Colts have been run by his daughter and the GM since the incident.