Rant: Go Deer Hunting

[CharredPC]

I've never been a big fan of deer hunting. Maybe I never saw the point, or was sensitive to the poor helpless creatures. With the events of this morning, though, I am here to say:

Shoot the f***ing bastards. Shoot them all. Every last g**damm one.

On my way to work this morning (ten minute commute), doing 45mph on a thin stretch of Geneva Road in Provo, UT, a deer jumped out in front of me. There was no time to stop, no time for anything. I didn't even fully get out an expletive before it crushed the front of my car.

As I was driving my cherished massive 1985 Buick LeSabre Collector's Edition sedan, it didn't even slow. It plowed the idiot animal right off the road and kept going. You have to give it points for being a tank; deer 0, Buick 1, right?

Not so much.

The whole front is trashed. The grill is simply gone; the fiberglass framing and headlight surround is a shattered, unsaveable mess. The hood ornament and nose is snapped and buckled in. It looks like the evaporator, after spending over $1,600 on redoing the whole original R12 AC system, is smashed up and leaking. All the front plastic and metal supports are snapped, crushed and hanging...

This couldn't have happened at a worse time. We have no money; we're barely getting by. It would cost at least a few thousand dollars to patch her back up using mismatched used parts. She still runs, but it's obviously illegal drive around like that. Not to mention any possible further serious damage that could be done which I haven't noticed yet in my two-minute inspection. What a wonderful time to be down to one car- when me and my wife are both looking for work, and I still don't know how I'm going to pay the mortgage this month.

So after pulling my 14.5 hour shift here today, I get to drive my Buick home and park it, maybe forever. We'll pull the insurance off it and let it rot until some unknown rich uncle dies or I sell it for parts. I remember seeing it for the first time at the sunny airport in California, and driving it home happily across Death Valley. I was starting to feel really excited and lucky that I'd gotten a hold of one, now that the prices are skyrocketing as they get increasingly rare. A rust-free 23-year-old car, one owner, good paint and no mechanical flaws; it was a few bits of trim away from being the perfect head-turner.

Now it's scrap.

Go deer hunting. I don't care if you cook the meat, mount the horns, or just like playing Grim Reaper. Track down and end the life of every one of those b**tards. And if you happen to be driving down Geneva Road anytime today, and spot a large deer on the east side of the road with broken chrome sticking out of it....

...stop and kick it in the head for me, will you?

 

[Anole]

hardly satellite-related

When I was a little kid in Florida, my Dad hit a big dog on the way home,
He couldn't have been going very fast... maybe 25 or 35mph?

Anyway, he caught the dog in the grill.
It rolled the the beast up 'n over the hood, and I believe the roof!
It's just been too many decades to recall if it broke up the windshield.
The dog came to ground some distance from the car, on all four.
. . . And ran away yelping!
The front of the car was torn up pretty well.
My Dad was pissed - it didn't even kill the dog.

Moral of the story?
If you hit a big bag of meat with your car ...
Just hope ya don't get an antler through the windshield! -


PS: good to see you back on the forum.

 

[CharredPC]

Thanks, I missed it here.

Luckily (I guess) the older Buicks have a big, high front end. If I were in a Saturn SL2 or something, I'm sure the deer would have been on my hood or windshield.

Sorry about the anger and talk of violence. I'm really not like that, but this car was my most / only cherished possession. Still, it is only a 'thing'... even if it's not really a replaceable one. I'm thankful it didn't happen to my wife while she was in her lower /aerodynamic 2005 Pontiac Grand Am.

...then again, the insurance would have paid to have that car fixed

 

[rv1pop]

Don't give up on the car, either! As a "thing" it is repairable. There are parts around for it. The hard ones to get are the rear sections, although white may be much harder to find then red. Most of those rigs get rear ended for some reason - at least in the Seattle - Everett area. See how deep the damage is. It may not have gotten much passed the Plastic/fibreglass. Evaporatores from Modine are not that expensive either. Yeah I rebuilt one, gave it to a daughter, and less than a week later she loaned the car to an unlicensed driver who got rearended. No insurance coverage, the person that hit her was uninsured... The scraped car was sold to a rebuilder for $200 - before I found out it was wrecked!.

 

[Jim S.]

Maybe everyone who hits a deer should sue their state government. After all, if they'd let you shoot the deer at will, there wouldn't be any of them left to trash your car. But instead, they all insist on regulating it so the deer don't go extinct. So they should be responsible for whatever happens as a result.

 

[CharredPC]

Don't give up on the car, either! As a "thing" it is repairable. There are parts around for it. The hard ones to get are the rear sections, although white may be much harder to find then red. See how deep the damage is. It may not have gotten much passed the Plastic/fibreglass. Evaporatores from Modine are not that expensive either.

It looks like most of the damage was plastic and fiberglass, plus the metal that holds that and the grill on. I already checked around, though, and no one within 200 miles had parts for something this old, of any color. My car really stuck out around here. Back east you could always find a Pick-n-Pull with big RWD 80's GM's; here they seem to shred everything pre-1990.

I'm just sad. I had a sweet car. Now I have an eyesore. I either end up driving it as-is- an ugly jalopy with pieces falling off- or I park it for the next 5-10 years and try sharing my wife's car. Which doesn't really work out. !sadroll

 

[rv1pop]

Can you find a recycle yard with a search computer? One of the places in Woodenville WA had a front clip for $400-500 last year. Hood and fenders forward. You may not be able to get Factory parts except by clip, but aftermarket parts are available. Check shows and restore books - hot rod mags. (I had 7 kids - had to learn ALL the tricks.)

 

[turbosat]

I feel for ya! I don't even remember how many of those things that have ran out and hit ME! And they happen just like you say-no time to react, they are attacking the vehicle it seems. Had a brand new 86Chev K15 4WD pickup, my first full sized FWD, and not a month I got smacked in the right front by a deer. It came up from below the roadway level from a deep gorge at the end of a bridge, just like it was shot from a cannon at my nice black pickup truck lol. Of course it then flung around and smacked the fender, and the right door on its way by. I thought it lived, but found out later somebody found the deer and either shot it, or it was dead and they took it home shortly after I hit it, started dressing it in their front yard and almost got arrested (it was a doe lol)

 

[Tron]

Charred, the same thing almost happened to me one night. I was on my way from Baton Rouge out to Zachary, a far-out suburb of Baton Rouge that is surrounded by wooded land. It was dark, and I had just rounded a turn. Fortunately, the road ahead was straight (one of the few places on that road that is) when I saw it--a doe, standing in the middle of the road, looking stupid. I had plenty of time to stop without slamming on my brakes, but the deer did not move as I approached. I had to get out of the car and yell at the thing, flashing my headlights and laying on the horn. Finally she decided to amble on off of the road and let me pass Would have trashed my '94 Cavalier and probably killed me...

 

[CharredPC]

The annoying thing is I've had deer in my path before. Years ago back in NY, it was 1am on a country road, and I managed to swerve around one a little '89 Dodge Spirit. Last year I was driving my wife's '05 Grand Am on a back road at midnight, and managed to maneuver through a bunch of them.

Now, in daylight and a few blocks away from the city, this big thing launches itself into my path. I swear these animals either have no brain or a death wish.

I gave my car a good going-over. One of the reasons I love these big-body GM's is that they just keep going; they can drive away from almost anything. The grill is simply gone, as I said. The fiberglass nose / headlight surround is badly cracked up. The metal bracing that holds it all on was snapped and bent in. The bumper filler is trashed, and the chromed plastic holding in the headlights have some cracking as well. So much for this ever being a show car...

So I played McGyver and attacked it with a crowbar and some packing tape. I straightened everything as best I could by hand, and pulled the metal bracing out of the evaporator. By some miracle, it has some big digs in it, but isn't leaking. The AC still works. The radiator (behind the evaporator) wasn't touched at all, so all damage is cosmetic, not mechanical. I taped the broken fiberglass in place so it wouldn't fall off, propped up by a shard of plastic grill. The hood no longer opens, thanks to the squashed catch underneath.

The results look miserable, but it's drivable. I keep telling myself that a car is meant for transportation... I almost bought a $400 '86 Olds Cutlass Ciera just so I wouldn't have to look at my once-beautiful classic in such a sorry state every day. Then I decided I was being childish- we don't have $50 to waste, let alone $400. The Buick runs, so I will use it. Though now the Collector's Edition dealer plate I have in the back window and my engraved keys just seem silly.

Someday if I get a good job that pays plenty of money, I'll either fix it up or buy another replacement just like it. My hands are tied until then.

Here's a couple shots of the car; Firstly, what the grill used to look like. Second, how it looked yesterday. Thirdly, how it looks now, packing tape and all.

 

[rv1pop]

I don't have the connections any more, but that is totally repairable using after market parts. If I remember right, the hood latch itself is bendable, so you should be able to get it working. Check with speed shops for possible sources. Even the dealers use afermarket parts for the older vehicles - Hey, maybe Iceberg has some conections though the insurance companies. (To sources that is.)

 

[turbosat]

Hey at least you got AC and headlights!!!!!
Takes a licking-keeps on ticking.

 

[Anole]

half empty, or . . .

Hey at least you got AC and headlights!!!!!

Hey, good point! - :up

Recently, a friend picked up a late mode Toyota Corolla which had been "totaled" by the insurance company.
He actually got it from the owner, and I believe he paid $250, but certainly not over $500.
Some serious shopping on eBay, and for under $1000, he got a new fender, bumper, maybe a hood, some other parts, and now all it needs is some painting.

. . . so maybe your cup is half full. -

 

[mastermesh]

Only 45 mph? Consider yourself lucky. Several months back my wife and I slammed in to a deer on I-70 traveling 70 mph! We got lucky in that it wasn't directly in front of us, sort of on the side, but his head was in front of the car, so it bent up a few things on a sidepanel and the hood that the insurance was able to have fixed within a week or two.... It could have been a lot worse if we hit him square on.

 

[Corrado]

Thankfully, you weren't injured. Here in upstate NY, we have a deer overpopulation problem. I welcome the deer hunting season here each year even though personally, I don't hunt.

I wrecked my old beloved 76 Ford pickup with a big buck. I did repair it but it was never the same. It about pushed the cab off the frame.

 

[Inno]

Thankfully, you weren't injured. Here in upstate NY, we have a deer overpopulation problem. I welcome the deer hunting season here each year even though personally, I don't hunt.

I wrecked my old beloved 76 Ford pickup with a big buck. I did repair it but it was never the same. It about pushed the cab off the frame.

My brother and I had a similar experience with a '77 Ford 4X4..........that was one tough truck but sustained more damage than the Buick at around 60MPH.
You're damn lucky it wasn't your wife's car..........'cept for the insurance factor. Well, you may be able to save some gas money now.........

 

[turbosat]

Ok everybody now has my permission to go shoot all of 'em. After my other posts, some deer visited my meager little garden spot and decimated my row of butterbeans. They were just about to bloom but the varmints ate off the tops of every plant-looked like somebody took scissors and just clipped them all off. They even ate off some of my puny little sunflower plants that weren't a foot tall. So kill all of them if you like.

 

[thomas34461usa]

You're lucky

I've never been a big fan of deer hunting. Maybe I never saw the point, or was sensitive to the poor helpless creatures. With the events of this morning, though, I am here to say:

Shoot the f***ing bastards. Shoot them all. Every last g**damm one.

On my way to work this morning (ten minute commute), doing 45mph on a thin stretch of Geneva Road in Provo, UT, a deer jumped out in front of me. There was no time to stop, no time for anything. I didn't even fully get out an expletive before it crushed the front of my car.

As I was driving my cherished massive 1985 Buick LeSabre Collector's Edition sedan, it didn't even slow. It plowed the idiot animal right off the road and kept going. You have to give it points for being a tank; deer 0, Buick 1, right?

Not so much.

The whole front is trashed. The grill is simply gone; the fiberglass framing and headlight surround is a shattered, unsaveable mess. The hood ornament and nose is snapped and buckled in. It looks like the evaporator, after spending over $1,600 on redoing the whole original R12 AC system, is smashed up and leaking. All the front plastic and metal supports are snapped, crushed and hanging...

This couldn't have happened at a worse time. We have no money; we're barely getting by. It would cost at least a few thousand dollars to patch her back up using mismatched used parts. She still runs, but it's obviously illegal drive around like that. Not to mention any possible further serious damage that could be done which I haven't noticed yet in my two-minute inspection. What a wonderful time to be down to one car- when me and my wife are both looking for work, and I still don't know how I'm going to pay the mortgage this month.

So after pulling my 14.5 hour shift here today, I get to drive my Buick home and park it, maybe forever. We'll pull the insurance off it and let it rot until some unknown rich uncle dies or I sell it for parts. I remember seeing it for the first time at the sunny airport in California, and driving it home happily across Death Valley. I was starting to feel really excited and lucky that I'd gotten a hold of one, now that the prices are skyrocketing as they get increasingly rare. A rust-free 23-year-old car, one owner, good paint and no mechanical flaws; it was a few bits of trim away from being the perfect head-turner.

Now it's scrap.

Go deer hunting. I don't care if you cook the meat, mount the horns, or just like playing Grim Reaper. Track down and end the life of every one of those b**tards. And if you happen to be driving down Geneva Road anytime today, and spot a large deer on the east side of the road with broken chrome sticking out of it....

...stop and kick it in the head for me, will you?

You're lucky. I heard a story onetime when I lived in Michigan how this guy was driving his large station wagon (during the 70's era) hit a deer. It landed on the side of the road. It damaged the car pretty bad, and the guy was looking at a dead deer on the side of the road. He got the idea that he might as well use it for meat. So he drags it up to the back of the station wagon and puts it in. So he proceeds to drive home when all of a sudden the deer wakes up from being knocked out! The deer using its legs demolished the whole inside of the car before the guy could pull over to the curb. Every window was broken the seats were torn up , the dash was trashed and it escaped out the front window. So it could have been worst!
Hope you had some Insurance on the car.

Tom