Highly inappropriate material on a kids channel

[Sapient]

Kissing between two boys? I don't know.

I grew up watching tom & jerry, roadrunner, bugs bunny, etc. Much violence in there but I always knew it was a cartoon and not real life (my dad sat and watched with me and discussed it with me). I can handle that conversation. I don't want to talk to my 5 year old about homosexuality at this time.

I would say that there is a difference between Bugs Bunny violence and Power Ranger (ok, not a cartoon, but you get my meaning) violence.

Likewise, I see a difference between two people kissing (regardless of gender) and the sort of objectification you see in beer commercials. We all make these decisions as parents. I simply don't let my son watch TV by himself, and when ads I don't approve of come on, I turn it off (or skip over them with the DVR).

Personally, I can't understand how seeing two boys kiss could damage my kid. I try harder to protect him from people/robots/monsters shooting at other people/robots/monsters and even from commercials that try to get him to buy things. My son is almost 6. He knows about homosexuality in the same way he knows about heterosexuality. Grown-ups fall in love with other grown-ups. Most men fall in love with women, most women fall in love with men, but some men fall in love with men and some women fall in love with women. "Ok dad".

I've never even heard of kids having gay sex because they saw two males kissing, but I see kids hitting each other while acting out Power Rangers all the time. And at the end of the day, I would much rather have my kid hit ON someone than hit them.

 

[Bobby]

Well said Sapient.....

 

[jsanders]

My son is almost 6.

And at the end of the day, I would much rather have my kid hit ON someone than hit them.

Maybe I mis-understood you, but I would rather see a kid be a kid, no hitting, and no hitting on on others. Frog catching, model rockets, fishing, etc.. were lots of fun when I was a kid.

I wonder what the producers of violent kids programs and video games did with their conscience. If video games that glorify rape, murder, and theft are supposed to be for mature people, why are they sold in Toys 'R' US?

Here is what this issue boils down to: It is the parents that are responsible for sex education, not the broadcasters. Parents may not look forward to that talk with their kids, but it is far better than taking a chance with someone else doing the job.

 

[Sapient]

Maybe I mis-understood you, but I would rather see a kid be a kid, no hitting, and no hitting on on others. Frog catching, model rockets, fishing, etc.. were lots of fun when I was a kid.

I was talking about relative risks. When I worry about what my kid sees, kissing is WAY down on the list. And as I said, I don't think seeing a kiss will make my kid hit on anyone anyway.

Here is what this issue boils down to: It is the parents that are responsible for sex education, not the broadcasters. Parents may not look forward to that talk with their kids, but it is far better than taking a chance with someone else doing the job.

I never considered "kissing" as a part of sex education. My son sees me kiss my wife all the time. But you are right. It is not the broadcasters responsibility to decide what you kid should and should not see. That is why it is the parent's responsibility to monitor what is on the tube and turn if off when they don't like something.

Would I prefer to be able to leave my TV on during commercials while watching a football game? Sure. But I don't think I have any right to tell ABC they can't advertise for Alias.

I do want to add that I am not trying to judge anyone here. I'm just describing my parenting strategy.

 

[slacker9876]

You poor, poor people I was watching TV with my son the other evening and we crossed over the "lifetime" network in surfing. There on the screen right before our eyes was a grotesquely fat woman openly exposed ... putting on a bra for lord knows what reason. My kid turned away and said "Dad that is gross, turn it off!" I said hey buddy, sorry 'bout that. I would rather explain naked, than gay but that is me.

The point is there is material that in inappropriate for all ages on lots of channels. This coming from a parent who plays dead or alive 3 and Halo with his kid!!! I even let him watch South Park until he was 4. Bottom line is something offends all of us, that is why we are to guide our kids as we see fit. It is you job a parent to educate your kid ... not shelter them.

Behind Enemy Lines gave me the first opportunity to explain television violence, that it is fake, and that the behavior was not okay. Nothing like explaining to my boy why a guy blew another guys brains out ... it was a lesson for me as a parent to check the friggin rating!!!



For those about to flame me (no pun intended) I have learned not to be a derelict parent thanks to my wife and you know what … I like Sponge Bob and Fairly Odd Parents!

 

[jsanders]

I never considered "kissing" as a part of sex education. My son sees me kiss my wife all the time.

I think that is a cultural thing. In some cultures, a kiss can be a greeting. For most around here, it isn't. Your son probably doesn't see you kiss women you aren't related to. That gives your son a message of fidelity. From watching you, he can see that a kiss is something special that only select people get. He may also notice that you kiss your wife differently than you would kiss a daughter or a mother, and that you probably don't kiss other women. Why are those kisses different? That is what leads to the sex education subject. After watching you, he will see something that doesn't fit the paradigm he has learned when watching the kids tv commercial, and may have some confusion about it or will have questions about it. Either way, it does send a message that a child will learn from.

 

[jsanders]

It is you job a parent to educate your kid ... not shelter them.

Behind Enemy Lines gave me the first opportunity to explain television violence, that it is fake, and that the behavior was not okay. Nothing like explaining to my boy why a guy blew another guys brains out ... it was a lesson for me as a parent to check the friggin rating!!!

Sorry, but you are wrong there. A parents job is to keep their child safe from harm *and* educate them. Safe from harm does mean a level of sheltering that changes with age. You shelter a newborn completely, you shelter a five year old a lot, you gradually decrease sheltering as the offspring reaches adulthood.

As for explaining violence, that is good, however, you must realize that the child's brain is still formulating. They have done studies and have found that a child is not able to discern fantasy from reality, regardless of how much explaining you do. As an example, haven't you heard of children not understanding the concept of death? The little girl at the funeral sees the coffin lowered into the ground, and on the way home she asks, "when will Mommy come home again?" Children are exposed to new concepts gradually. A prodigy now and then can do calculus at five years of age, but 99% can' do it regardless of how much explaining you do. They are still children. A five year old can't be responsible for making all of life's decisions and take care of himself. The adult makes decisions for the child, the adult protects the child, the adult teaches the child when the child is *ready*.

 

[Sapient]

I think that is a cultural thing. In some cultures, a kiss can be a greeting. For most around here, it isn't. Your son probably doesn't see you kiss women you aren't related to. That gives your son a message of fidelity. From watching you, he can see that a kiss is something special that only select people get. He may also notice that you kiss your wife differently than you would kiss a daughter or a mother, and that you probably don't kiss other women. Why are those kisses different? That is what leads to the sex education subject. After watching you, he will see something that doesn't fit the paradigm he has learned when watching the kids tv commercial, and may have some confusion about it or will have questions about it. Either way, it does send a message that a child will learn from.

While he certainly does not see me kiss other people the way I kiss my wife, he surely sees non-married people kiss. And I am not trying to teach him that it is wrong for single people to kiss. He sees it as an expression of love.

And he knows that grown-ups can kiss differently than kids and that we have different kids of love for different people, and all that can be explained without reference to sex at all.

The fact is that he is going to see people kiss, both on TV and in real life. I not only could not protect him from that, I don't want to protect him from that.

 

[Sapient]

Sorry, but you are wrong there. A parents job is to keep their child safe from harm *and* educate them. Safe from harm does mean a level of sheltering that changes with age. You shelter a newborn completely, you shelter a five year old a lot, you gradually decrease sheltering as the offspring reaches adulthood.

As for explaining violence, that is good, however, you must realize that the child's brain is still formulating. They have done studies and have found that a child is not able to discern fantasy from reality, regardless of how much explaining you do. As an example, haven't you heard of children not understanding the concept of death? The little girl at the funeral sees the coffin lowered into the ground, and on the way home she asks, "when will Mommy come home again?" Children are exposed to new concepts gradually. A prodigy now and then can do calculus at five years of age, but 99% can' do it regardless of how much explaining you do. They are still children. A five year old can't be responsible for making all of life's decisions and take care of himself. The adult makes decisions for the child, the adult protects the child, the adult teaches the child when the child is *ready*.

I agree. The concept of "real" is not something that young children can really get. My wife is an elementary school teacher. During a recent drill, the lights had to be turned off. This scared a couple of the kindergartners because they thought Chucky (yes, Chucky, the killer doll) was going to get them.

That is not to say that you should not help your kids to understand violence. The subject does have to be introduced gradually. Each kid is different. Some 5 year olds can't deal with the Lion King. Others can deal with Star Wars. Personally, I don't think any should be exposed to Chucky.

 

[hpman247]

I must input something else. At five years old I was watching horror, violence, and all the other stuff that "adults" should watch. As I said earlier I turned out fine because my mom explained to me that smoking was bad, alcohol is bad, TV vionece is not real etc. Maybe I am one in a million, but I got it.

Slacker, I agree with you . I am no parent (18 y.o), but when I am, it will be my job to protect and educate my child, not to shelter him or her from the harsh realities of life.

As an example, I own the first season of South Park on DVD. I let my cousins who were 9 and 5 at the time watch it with me. I was 15. They both knew that it was fake and considered it funny as I do. The five year old played GTA 3 and both of them are now straight A students and are wonderful very mannered people. They would not harm a fly, and that is because their parents and myself EDUCATED NOT SHELTERED them.

 

[Sapient]

You know, you could punch you kid in the face every day and he might turn out fine. It still makes you a crappy parent.

But congratulations on educating your cousins on South Park. Don't forget to make them wander the streets for a few days. You wouldn't want to shelter them.

 

[NightRyder]

Slacker, I agree with you . I am no parent (18 y.o), but when I am, it will be my job to protect and educate my child, not to shelter him or her from the harsh realities of life.

No offense but parenting advice from an 18 yr. old non-parent has about as much worth as sexual instruction from a virgin. With some things there is no substitute for experience.


NightRyder

 

[hpman247]

First off, NightRyder, I just want to say that I agree with you in that everything comes with experience. However, I am unlike most people my age in that I think I understand life and what comes with it more than other people my age. As I stated, I am no parent, but not being a parent does not make me have inferior knowledge to that of a parent. I have watched my cousins, who I should call brothers and sisters, grow up. I have seen parenting in many facets, sometime which I wanted to tell the other parent off because I knew they were being stupid. In my opinion this is a stupid discussion. People will do what they have been brought up by and in my case I was brought up by a wonderful, caring, educated, and loving mother who has been with me through all my steps in life.

Like I said, myself and my cousins may be three in a million, but there is no way Sapient that we have crappy parents. That is what your statement suggests. I am must fiercely disagree…contigo, mi amigo. Education is a reason to not shelter your children in my opinion. And when I say shelter, what I mean is censorship. Not sheltering your child from being a gangbanger, etc, which should not happen anyway if you educate the child. I am a firm believer that education is the key to success in life and that is why I take the most demanding classes in school and when I go to college next year I will do the same. Education can get you out of a rut that you may be stuck in, you just have to believe that it will. My mom taught me what was right from wrong since I was a baby, and I know that is why she let me watch whatever I wanted, and that is also the reason that my cousins get to watch what they want. And that is the reason we turned out the way we did…not because we were sheltered from TV (like I saw the Alias comment..dunno what’s wrong with Alias) but because we were taught right from wrong, something most parents that I have seen must not be able to do well b/c many whom I know do censor their children and they turn out to be rude, preppy, and idiotic, non-caring peoples.

Sorry for the essay, but I do feel strongly on this!

 

[caesar gdi]

No offense but parenting advice from an 18 yr. old non-parent has about as much worth as sexual instruction from a virgin. With some things there is no substitute for experience.


NightRyder

Agreed!!!

 

[NightRyder]

First off, NightRyder, I just want to say that I agree with you in that everything comes with experience. However, I am unlike most people my age in that I think I understand life and what comes with it more than other people my age. As I stated, I am no parent, but not being a parent does not make me have inferior knowledge to that of a parent. I have watched my cousins, who I should call brothers and sisters, grow up. I have seen parenting in many facets, sometime which I wanted to tell the other parent off because I knew they were being stupid. In my opinion this is a stupid discussion. People will do what they have been brought up by and in my case I was brought up by a wonderful, caring, educated, and loving mother who has been with me through all my steps in life.

hpman247, While not agreeing or disagreeing with your opinions regarding parenting, my point is simply this, until you are a parent there is no way to truly understand the reality of it. Unfortunately there is no way to communicate how having a child changes you. From the first time you hold that small life in your arms the world is never the same again. No amount of intellectualizing can prepare you for it, or the lifelong job that follows. No child comes with a manual and each one is different. I've seen the offspring of wonderful caring parents go horribly astray and children with the most disadvantaged background become outstanding citizens. You do your best then hope and pray.

I know your young and I won't hold that against you. I wish I still knew everything I did when I was 18.


NightRyder

 

[slacker9876]

Sorry, but you are wrong there. A parents job is to keep their child safe from harm *and* educate them. Safe from harm does mean a level of sheltering that changes with age. You shelter a newborn completely, you shelter a five year old a lot, you gradually decrease sheltering as the offspring reaches adulthood.

You mean you shelter. I don't shelter my child. I don't go out of my way to expose him to things either. Since he is from my own DNA makeup he is about as crafty as his old man. I have noted that he can be equally manipulative ... to a scary level. However he is a well behaved boy, does well in school and *most* of the time respects and UNDERSTANDS what an 8-year old can and cannot do. Anyway ... to stay on the thread topic, had my kid seen the commercial he would have understood (even at 5) because he knows, what he needs to know, about homosexuality ... and violence, and drugs and fantasy and reality and more importantly ... self-respect.

Enter the phrase "My dad can kick your dads ass", where required"

As for explaining violence, that is good, however, you must realize that the child's brain is still formulating. They have done studies and have found that a child is not able to discern fantasy from reality, regardless of how much explaining you do. As an example, haven't you heard of children not understanding the concept of death? The little girl at the funeral sees the coffin lowered into the ground, and on the way home she asks, "when will Mommy come home again?" Children are exposed to new concepts gradually. A prodigy now and then can do calculus at five years of age, but 99% can' do it regardless of how much explaining you do. They are still children. A five year old can't be responsible for making all of life's decisions and take care of himself. The adult makes decisions for the child, the adult protects the child, the adult teaches the child when the child is *ready*.[/QUOTE]
I suppose you are right ... really it is a matter of raw intelligence and not much else.

 

[HokieEngineer]

To whoever started this thread:

What would you do if two men were kissing in a park, or somewhere in public that your kids saw it happen? Should we outlaw that?

By your logic, I should call and complain whenever I see a black man kiss a white woman on tv because I am a racist bigot who teaches my kids not to accept a person for who they are inside.

No, I'm not gay, but I get tired of people complain about crap like this. Dont like it? Turn the TV off and read your kids a book.

 

[jsanders]

First off, NightRyder, I just want to say that I agree with you in that everything comes with experience. However, I am unlike most people my age in that I think I understand life and what comes with it more than other people my age.

Ha ha ha ha ha. You have no idea how predictable that sounds! Every 18 year old thinks that they are "unlike most people [their] age" and of course, *they* "understand life and what comes with it more than other people [their] age". No offense Harry Potter, but your own words do you injustice. :shocked

 

[jsanders]

You mean you shelter. I don't shelter my child. I don't go out of my way to expose him to things either.

I'm sure you shelter your child, it just means to protect the interests of a child.

Parents who own guns probably won't teach a 2-year old how to use one because they aren't ready. Maybe they might teach them all about gun safety when they are five or something (the parent will decide an age appropriate for the child). Regardless of how much time we spend teaching them about gun safety, we won't give them a loaded gun and then leave them in a room full of their five-year-old peers would we? Call it sheltering, call it protecting, call it setting boundaries. We all do it. We teach and protect our kids from serious harm.

 

[carload]

What would you do if two men were kissing in a park, or somewhere in public that your kids saw it happen? Should we outlaw that?

Hoo boy! Let me scrounge around for the right metaphor. If I had taken my son to a kids' theater show, and in the middle of it all two normal-looking men on stage kissed as if they meant it, I'd be surprised, disappointed and uncomfortable about having to explain it when I hadn't expected to.

(In the park, the couple probably wouldn't be the center of attention, so it would be much easier to distract my son away from them. "Oh, they want to be alone to talk. Which way is the playground?")

No, that doesn't mean I think we should outlaw such behavior. It means that it's inappropriate (as the original poster put it) in the context of young children's programming.