Being a Floridian
You might be a Floridian if......
You have FEMA's number on your speed dialer.
You have more than 300 C and D batteries in your kitchen drawer.
Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti Os.
You are thinking of repainting your house to match the plywood
covering your windows.
When describing your house to a prospective buyer, you say it
has three bedrooms, two baths and one safe room.
You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at Home Depot.
You are delighted to only pay $3 for a gallon of regular
unleaded.
You decide that your patio furniture looks better on the bottom
of the pool.
You own more than three large coolers.
You wish that other people get hit by a hurricane and not feel
the least bit guilty about it.
You have 2-liter coke bottles and milk jugs filled with water in
your freezer.
Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain without
reading the directions; but today you can assemble a portable generator
by candlelight.
You catch a 13-pound redfish in your driveway.
You can recite from memory whole portions of your homeowner's
insurance policy.
You have had tuna fish more than 5 days in a row.
There is a roll of tar paper in your garage.
You can rattle off the names of three or more meteorologists who
work at the Weather Channel.
Someone comes to your door to tell you they found your roof.
Ice is a valid topic of conversation.
Relocating to Cleveland, OH does not seem like such a crazy
idea.
You spend more time on your roof than in your living room.
You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer, fence builder
or a tree worker.
A battery powered TV is considered a home entertainment center.
You don't worry about relatives wanting to visit during the
summer.
Your child's first words are "hunker down".
Having a tree in your living room does not necessarily mean it's
Christmas.
You know the difference between the "good side" of a storm and
the "dirty side."
You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the air
conditioning.
You might be a Floridian if......
You have FEMA's number on your speed dialer.
You have more than 300 C and D batteries in your kitchen drawer.
Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti Os.
You are thinking of repainting your house to match the plywood
covering your windows.
When describing your house to a prospective buyer, you say it
has three bedrooms, two baths and one safe room.
You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at Home Depot.
You are delighted to only pay $3 for a gallon of regular
unleaded.
You decide that your patio furniture looks better on the bottom
of the pool.
You own more than three large coolers.
You wish that other people get hit by a hurricane and not feel
the least bit guilty about it.
You have 2-liter coke bottles and milk jugs filled with water in
your freezer.
Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain without
reading the directions; but today you can assemble a portable generator
by candlelight.
You catch a 13-pound redfish in your driveway.
You can recite from memory whole portions of your homeowner's
insurance policy.
You have had tuna fish more than 5 days in a row.
There is a roll of tar paper in your garage.
You can rattle off the names of three or more meteorologists who
work at the Weather Channel.
Someone comes to your door to tell you they found your roof.
Ice is a valid topic of conversation.
Relocating to Cleveland, OH does not seem like such a crazy
idea.
You spend more time on your roof than in your living room.
You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer, fence builder
or a tree worker.
A battery powered TV is considered a home entertainment center.
You don't worry about relatives wanting to visit during the
summer.
Your child's first words are "hunker down".
Having a tree in your living room does not necessarily mean it's
Christmas.
You know the difference between the "good side" of a storm and
the "dirty side."
You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the air
conditioning.
... good ones John
