You love your kids, but do you like them?

[Van]

I think that its pretty much a given that most people love their kids but do you like them as well? Have there been times during the years where you have found yourself being tested even with your love for you child by how they are acting each day? Im perfectly aware that there are people who dont even love their own children and could care less about the welfare and welbeing of their kids so those are not the ones that Im focused on, Im asking all those parents here who do love their kids, this is not a thread for judging anyone so lets keep this one clean, I reserve the right to ask the mods to remove any post that is atacking any other member.

 

[Derwin0]

Love my kids, of course.

My (7 in a couple weeks) daughter has a whiningness to her that is very annoying. If she was someone else's kid, not sure I'd like her as much. I know during my wife's latest pregnancy that she had tried her nerves a lot.

My 4 1/2 yr. old son, funny kid, makes people laugh. But I've noticed that he can be a bully to smaller kids, or bigger kids that he perseves are meek.

 

[Van]

I love my daughter, she's our first and probably our last though not due to her. She has for all intents and purposes both her mothers and my atitudes all rolled up into one big mess with some of her own starting show through. She is stubborn just as I am and that irks my wife and I when it comes to getting it through to her to not jump on the bed or to leave the cat alone. When she gets angry she yells just like my wife does and the whole world knows she is upset wich completely drives me up the wall as I cant stand anyone that feels the need to be loud ( Im the type that enjoys listning to a piano solo on an old 78 to hear the pops and hiss in with the music).

Im hoping that she will grow out of some of these traits soon, I think we are going to have to bite the bullet and put her into daycare several times a week just so that she can pick up bits and pieces of other kids personalities to build into her own.

 

[KE4EST]

What do you use as punishments for her?

 

[Bogy]

Which kid? Which day? Which hour in the day?

I've got a little different perspective than the two posts so far. My "kids" are 27, 23, and 19, so I'm not dealing with the day to day of raising a young child. My oldest can be a whiny, self-centered princess who feels the world revolves around her. Then again, we are really going to miss her in a few weeks when we have a graduation party for her sister and brother (one from college, the other from high school). She is the one who pitches in on something like that. I missed her a lot this past winter because she is the one who loves to go to basketball games with me, and she is currently in Kenya in the Peace Corps. Then again, she is the one who every time I hear from her has thought of something else I need to send her.

My second daughter is very sweet, and very creative. For the most part very independent, although when I hear from her its usually because she has a problem, and needs help. She has middle-child syndrome, and (at least at times) feels very neglected and unloved. Not necessarily without reason, but she really plays that card at times. She is much more likely than her sister to see herself as a guest when she gets home for a few days. She is very intelligent, and we can talk for a long time on issues of the day.

My son and I don't always see eye to eye, but most of the time I not only like him, he told me a few weeks ago he likes me, most of the time.
We have spent a lot of time playing video games together. Most of time, on many issues, he tells me just about everything going on in his life. Next week he starts a new job in the community 45 miles away, and soon after he finishes hs he will be moving there, and will start school in July. I'm going to miss him.

I love my kids, I also like them (most of the time), and I am very proud of all of them. Those of you who have younger kids and aren't sure you always like them, just take a little comfort in the fact that you are dealing with people who are changing rapidly. You very well may like them one day, and not the next. Probably the advice I would give to those raising young children is that probably the most effective thing you can do in raising your kids to be the people you think they should be is to make sure you are that kind of person. If you are seeing things in your kids you don't like, take a look at your own life. If you don't like it in them, you are the one who needs to change. And quick.

 

[iafirebuff]

My duaghter (9years old) is also my best friend. She loves to go to gun shows and mess with satellite dishes and what not. She is total nerd like me

 

[Van]

What do you use as punishments for her?

We have done time outs but those are ineffective with her, swatting on the hand or bottom helps to some degrea as does taking away things she likes. We do reward her for doing things she is told to do and for being brave, I took her out to IHOP yesterday after her xray and got her a funny face pancake and lunch time with daddy. She isnt a horrible child, she does really good out in public except at the grocery store where she wont ride in a cart easily.

 

[navychop]

iafirebuff:

Encourage the interest in guns. There are lots of scholarships for female shooters (.22 & pellet) at various colleges. Title IX (I think I got that right) requires equal effort for women's sports, so they beat the bushes for female "sportsmen." Shooting is one area that counts. My boss's daughter just got a full 4 year college scholarship to be on their shooting team. She has Olympic potential.

There are local shooting teams she can join (no, she's not too young). Check with the NRA (whatever you may think of them) or a local Izzak Walton League (some chapters support shooting clubs).

 

[Bogy]

If you want to improve your kid's behavior, limit the amount of television they can watch. If you have a kid that talks back, gives a lot of smart aleck answers, etc., just take a look at the example they see on most shows. This may not seem to agree with my previous post that you and your spouse are the determining factor in your kids attitude, but if you AREN'T like that...

We would notice a huge difference in our kids when we severely limited the amount of tv they watched when they were young. For one thing, they got way more discriminating in what they watched, rather than just watching anything. When they only got to watch an hour or two and had to choose. I'm not one who thinks that playing video games or watching horror movies will turn a kid into a mass murderer, but hour after hour of watching other kids sassing their parents does have an effect.

 

[navychop]

Bingo!

 

[Paul Wozniak]

I love all my kids (5 of them, 25, 21, 19, 17, and 2 yrs. old) unconditionally. Don't see or hear from the oldest very much, and see and hear too much from the youngest, But I love them and like them just the same. They are my life, and the reason I wake up every morning and drag my ass off to work.

 

[rockymtnhigh]

I love and like my kid. Ok, there are sometimes when a 9 year old can get on your nerves, but all and all, he is a great kid. If he wasn't I would not have done the Cub Scout thing for him.

 

[cybok0]

My daughter(7 years old) can be a royal pain at times, she mouths off and has an attitude problem (I blame her mother for those ).

She can be a perfect child, and she can be the anti-Christ.

But all in all I love her, but at times I don't like her, but that usually doesn't last that long.

 

[Van]

Just to clarify I do love my daughter and I like her, I have met people in my life who have to varying degrea's said they dont like their kids.

Dear daughter only really watches pbs kids shows and may occasionaly watch a movie with us but focuses more on some of her things, the cat ( we took Buford back after he went after my wife when he smelled the new kitten on her ) and playing on an old imac I got for her to use some kids software. We are really careful with whats on the tv because she is aware of concepts such as violence between people and death after having to explain it to her a while ago.