I'm offering counseling for following conditions, all for the low rate of $100.00/hour:
HD-OCD: For when you just can't wait anymore, and spend obsessive amounts of time online and guide flipping, hoping to see another "HD" symbol like a crack addict looks for another rock, only to be disappointed once again, but you just HAVE to try again 10 minutes later.
HD "DTV Let Me Down" Syndrome: For when you see that D* does not deliver on the 19th, and you slope into a deep depression, filled with doubt that you will EVER see another HD channel appear in the guide.
HD "Beat you To It" Phobia: For when you find out the competition gets more HD first, and you can never log into the forums again for fear you might have been noticed by a DISH troll and get laughed at with their smileys.
These are serious conditions, and require immediate treatment.
P.S. I give group discounts too!